


Midnight Rain

by sorrysenpai



Category: Purple Hyacinth - Ephemerys & Sophism (Webcomic)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Porn, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Oral Sex, Pining, SPICEEE, Shower Sex, Smut, Vaginal Fingering, after so long, i finally finished this, you guys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-09
Updated: 2020-09-09
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:34:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26374297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sorrysenpai/pseuds/sorrysenpai
Summary: Where Lauren has a long day at work, and Kieran wants to make her feel good.
Relationships: Lauren Sinclair & Kieran White, Lauren Sinclair/Kieran White
Comments: 13
Kudos: 79





	Midnight Rain

Lauren stepped into the shower, toes flinching as they touched the chilled ceramic floor. Clean and white, in sheer contrast to her mind, that was in shreds, reflecting upon the disastrous day she survived; her sleep schedule was a mess; she lost Sake again. It was during her patrol today, where she spotted him in the crowd once again. Hermann was still a prick, and today, became one of those 'lucky' days where he was kind enough to remind her of her mistake, yet again. 

_Why doesn’t anybody believe me?_

Taking a deep breath, Lauren turned the faucet and released the rain and the hot water gushed down, darkening her red hair, trickling down her back and her sides. She bathe her skin lightly as the steam clouded the room, mirroring the thoughts in her head, flooding every inch of her mind, with no way to be out. Engulfed in the bleak isolation, with only the sounds of water pattering the floor and the warmth covering her skin, her consciousness faded into dullness, and everything real became a foggy illusion. 

She paid no heed, but he did. And it was concerning to see Lauren, out of everyone, like that. She was here once again, at his apartment, with thankfully no wounds or blood this time. But unlike the last time, the aura and situation this time were completely different. The last time she was here, she still trusted him, enough to let him carry her, enough to spend a night there, with their camaraderie still alive, and not dangling off the edge of a blade. Their walls were up this time, always expecting the other one to pick up the knife, even though they both knew no one would. Things were gradually changing and getting better between the both of them, but the uneasiness didn’t seem to leave, which was nothing out of the ordinary, considering the...rough path they crossed. 

He could hear the water hitting the floor. The sound of the shower was calming, in a way rain was, falling down to the ground, creating peace despite not being soundless. Peaceful in a soft rhythm, unlike her. He was well aware of the fact that Lauren Sinclair was a serious workaholic, and he had now seen it with his own eyes. Buried in paperwork and files, running around and finishing up last. Even on the days when her eyes would be red, and she would clearly be overworked and on the verge of burning out, she would be seen running around, with no signs of wanting a break. 

And all he could do was watch. Speaking of, he didn’t realise he was staring at the door and zoning out, till he leaned back on the couch and snapped back to reality.

_There really is no one like you, Lauren._

\------------------

He wasn't impatient, but after what felt like hours, Kieran finally got up and walked up to the bathroom door, and knocked. 

“Lauren?” He called out. No response. “Hey, _Officer?_ Everything okay in there?” Silence. 

It’s not that Lauren didn’t want to respond, no. She couldn’t hear him. She was lost, and her senses dulled out the presence of her surroundings. Filled with the things that she was yet to do, those things she didn’t want to care about, everything a blur, she was wholly inundated by it. 

Kieran knocked once again, and the door creaked open. 

_Huh?_

He froze. Was the lock broken? Did she not lock the door? That’s what it looked like to him. He stood puzzled for a moment and was about to shut the door when his eyes caught a peek of her silhouette through the steamed-up glass—slouched over, drenched red hair covering her face, arms hugging her body. The bold, strong-willed Lauren he knew, was in her most vulnerable state in front of him. Everybody has their weaknesses, but seeing Lauren like that was scary.

And he felt responsible for it all. 

He moved away from the doorway because this was an invasion of privacy, and she was not gonna be happy if she caught him. But something from within him made him pause again. He watched as she didn’t move at all under the shower, as if all life had been sucked out of her, and if anybody were to touch her, she'll fall. He didn't want to see her like that. This was going to be a mistake, but he wanted her to feel better. _He wanted to_ make her feel better. Lauren was still lost in her moment, not noticing him entering and Kieran himself did not realise what was happening and the next thing he knew he was stripped of his attire. He quietly stepped into the shower behind her, not making a sound. 

\------------------

Lauren opened her eyes only to realise that she had lost the track of time as got out of her clouded daze. Realising that she was still in the shower, she moved her hand towards the faucet to turn it off but was taken by surprise when Kieran’s reached the faucet before hers did. The gushing stopped, filling the bathroom with silence. She panicked for a second, about to lash out, but halted. It wasn’t the best idea considering she wasn’t dressed and lashing out would mean flashing him even more than what he could see just now. All she was able to do was hug herself some more, in a futile attempt to cover herself. 

She didn’t understand what happened just now. Just how much was she lost? How far did her mind make her wander off to, that she let her guard down? She was worried, but then, she didn't even care anymore. It was a fucked up day in her fucked up life, and she really stopped caring at this point. She could feel the heat from him, even though she was the one who was under the hot water till now, or was it the steam that didn’t go down?

His hand didn’t move from its post, it still rested against the wall, caging Lauren from her left. None of them said anything for a while and just stood there. 

“You okay?” He whispered near her ear, taking a step, inching closer to her. Lauren simply responded with a small nod, her back still facing him and ignoring the fact that both of them were naked and close, _too close_. He wrapped his free arm around her waist, pulling her to him and pushed the wet strands of her hair behind her ear with the other, which was now away from the knob and rested on her shoulder. His thumb pressed into the skin and drew gentle rings on her shoulders, massaging gently easing the tense muscles. 

“You don’t look so…‘Okay’, Do you know that?” With her back pressed in his body, she felt more exposed than she ever had, and Lauren couldn't help but hug herself some more. His arm felt cold against her soaked torso, running a chill inside her, and yet, _yet_ it made her feel a sense of _warmth_ she hadn’t felt for a while now. Lauren was in a dark place, sucked into a monotonous void, sunlight blocked out by the Ardahlis winters, and every contact with other's skin, every inhaled breath felt rough and harsh, subtle brushes of fingers against palms felt like daggers sinking in blood. But as though a miracle, the sensation perished as soon as he touched her. 

“I don’t think that should matter”, she whispered back. She didn’t want another one of those therapeutic speeches; she’d get them enough from her uncle, now Kieran was going down the same path.

“I beg to differ because you matter. And you should let go sometimes.”

_Let go? How can I?_

Holding back the urge to scoff, she rolled her eyes. She turned her head in his direction to face him, and in contrast to her, he was completely dried up, with messy hair held back in a loose bun, most strands falling out of it, and resting on his forehead and in front his eyes. And _his eyes._ Blue flames in the midst of darkness, electrified and glowing with a novel shine in them, burning in emotion she was unfamiliar with. His eyes peered into her tired ones when she looked at him. Lost was the flame in hers, but they were alive nevertheless. Despite the secret hidden behind the fire in her eyes, he could see a being with no sins. She held beauty in a way words cannot describe. 

He leaned in and rested his head on hers. They remained like that, having a moment in intimacy, savouring the closeness, getting lost for a while. Then Kieran leaned in again making way to the bottom of her ear. 

“Lauren, can I?” he whispered. 

Her eyes closed as she feels his warm breath hitting her skin. She nodded ever so slightly as if any movement would dissolve out the fragile moment. His arms were enveloped around her now, caging her against him. As if he were clinging on to her, ~~_just like his lost humanity_~~ , like his desire to be there for her. 

His lips felt soft against her damp skin as Kieran started kissing the line of her temple down her collarbone, before moving to her neck, burying his face in it, pampering her with more kisses and occasional nips, leaving her shivering in his arms. She bit back a hum as his hands explored her figure. Lauren could feel him hardening behind her, as one of his hands found solace under her breast, while the other rested at her hip. 

He latched onto her ear and sucked hard making her wince. The sudden harshness was a little overwhelming but it gradually changed into a rough pang of relief. And he continued to do it, kissing her neck, her ears, sucking in a bruise, and then she let out a gasp. His hand had trailed her inner thigh, where the heat had started pooling between Lauren’s legs as she felt his thumb rubbing her nipple. Her pulse rose, head leaning back and slightly to the side to give him more access. 

Lauren reached a hand in his hair, palm at the back of his skull, urging him on. Her fingers raked through his soft messy locks, massaging a little. He purred at the gesture, sending vibrations till her toes, and Lauren was shivering again. His hands were slow and gentle, trailing lower between her legs, till he finally reached where she wanted him. He placed a soft kiss on her shoulder as a sign, before rubbing a finger around her entrance, earning another sharp gasp from Lauren.

“ _Kieran_ ” she whispered sharply. He hummed near her ear as a response, while continuing to touch her. Every move he made, every touch on her skin was electrifying for Lauren. Her breathing was getting harder by the second, but his fingers didn't stop. He continued rubbing her in a circular motion at an agonizingly slow pace. 

“Don’t stop” she choked out, barely managing to build a response. She could feel him smile at her temple.

“Okay, Officer” 

Without a warning, he circled her clit, before pressing his thumb right on it and gradually picking up the pace. Gasping for air, Lauren couldn't hold back the moan, as Kieran continued to stroke her clit, and brush and pinch the, now hard, peaks of her nipples. He continued with slower movements, taking his time to latch onto her neck, pressing of kisses all over, then eventually biting hard into her soft skin, leaving behind marks as the moans left her. He kept his movements steady, leaving her in anticipation on what's to come next, and then finally, _finally_ slipped a finger inside her.

Lauren's breath hitched, and her back arched and had it not been for Kieran holding her, she would’ve fallen over. 

Knots started coiling inside her stomach and she was breathing hard, eyes shut wide as she whimpered in his grasp. Without realisation, her fingers got harsh, nails dug up his neck and back into his hair, gripping and tugging tightly, making Kieran groan as he thrust his finger back in her. He was surprised by the way she was clenching around his hand.

Lauren let out a loud moan **,** as he left her her hips twitching, and her breath, erratic. She was getting close, and Kieran knew it. He could see it. So he pinched hard on her breast, then suddenly withdrew his hand from her tight core. 

She fell silent. Eyes still shut, realization crept inside. She could hear silence for a split second before Kieran laughed softly, adjusting her, so now she wasn’t leaning on him. He held her by the waist, nose pressed on the back of her neck. The elation vanished like the sun in rain.

“My, my _officer_ , aren’t you an excited one?” She felt the smirk form on his face. Her eyes opened suddenly, then reality hit her like a truck. A reminder, that this long day was still not over, that she was still in this shower, here for more than she intended to, more than she wanted to. Then the calm turned into a fire and she filled up with vex. This was irritating, and, she wouldn’t admit, but, a part of her was disappointed that he stopped. She felt that this could at least be something that could be better compared to all that she’d dealt with.

But then again, wasn’t she the one at fault again? Thinking that Kieran would even care if she was having it hard or not? Let alone _feel_ something about her? 

Brushing away her thoughts, she elbowed him in the ribs lightly, getting herself out of his grip. He frowned and tried to hold her again, but she blocked his movement and pushed him by his chest. She covered hers with her arm and turned to face him.

“Nevermind. Considering how everything is a joke to you, it was a mistake that I thought this would be an exception,”

She walked right past him and headed to the shelf that had the towels. But before she could take another step, she was grabbed roughly by the arm, and pinned to the cold wall. Goosebumps started rising on her body, down her spine, up her neck, everywhere, and she could feel her breath hitch her heart leap. She could’ve sworn it stopped for a moment, before starting again. Kieran was before her, pinning her arms above her head. All humour drained from his face, devoid of any emotion, while his eyes were dark, darker than the night at no moon.

He leaned towards her, lips inches away from hers. They were so close that his lips brushed against hers as he spoke “A joke?” he whispered. Heat crept on Lauren’s face, although there wasn’t a tint of blush on her cheeks. “Bold of you to assume I was done with you, _love_ ” his tone was harsh, in a way that Lauren wanted nothing more than him to consume her.

She closed her eyes as she felt his lips move closer to her ear. He whispered again. 

“Well, if you still think I’m “joking”, that means I better get serious,”

His grip loosened around her arms, as he placed a light kiss on her jawline, letting another shiver run through her.

“Say, should I continue, or do you want me to stop, Lauren?” the hint of concern was evident in his tone, only slightly, but it was there. And she took notice. No matter how much he looked forward to what happened next, the last thing he wanted to do was force her into something she didn’t want.

She opened her eyes and turned towards him, unintentionally making their noses brush against one another. They locked gazes, and he noticed that her eyes were still tired, but somehow still had that magnetic energy in them, that always managed to captivate him, luring him in like a moth to a flame.

And as for her, just the look in his eyes was intoxicating enough that she wanted to bite him all over.

“Go ahead” her voice was so soft, Kieran probably wouldn’t hear her response had it not been for their proximity. His eyes darkened further as if something broke loose in him, and he let go of her hands, and cupped her face and kissed her. He kissed her hard. Her arms wrapped around his neck and her head tilted. Gaining a better angle, both moaned simultaneously at their actions. He parted her lips with his own as she gasped again making his tongue slip in her mouth, exploring every corner as if this was the last time he will ever get to do this. 

Nipping at her lower lip and tugging slightly, his hands trailed from her cheeks and grazed down her sides and ribs, till they reached her hips. He broke the kiss and trailed his lips over the line of her neck to her collarbones again. Lauren groaned as she felt him carve another mark. She expected him to move back up, but to her surprise, he went lower. 

He kissed her all the way down, her collarbones, her cleavage, her ribs, till he was finally on his knees and reached her hips. Her body twitched with force and a loud cry left her as his lips trailed lower. His grip tightened, eyes never leaving hers as he sucked another bruise in her hip. He bit, and gripped her harder, and eventually moved down to her cunt. Kieran forced her legs apart as his tongue ran up the lips. Her eyes widened and she cried out again, voice getting high pitched at the end, and her breathing was irregular again.

He barely did anything, and yet managed to do so much. 

He smiled looking at her react that way. She was left mewling and needy in his grip. Stalling no further, Kieran closed his lips around the bud and Lauren’s head tilted back, pressing into the bathroom wall as her face flushed and eyes shut tight. Whatever sound travelling up her throat died on her tongue as she let the indulgence take over her. 

His movements were slow as he sucked and massaged her clit with his tongue. 

He eventually picked up the pace, flicking against her in rapid motions, leaving her bucking her hips and trembling, hands clawing at his hair. She let out another moan as his tongue continued to beat her heat relentlessly. Impressed, he pushed a thumb in between her lips, rewarding himself with a louder and a more keening voice. 

“ _Ohh, Kieran,_ ”

She almost screamed his name in the midst of her huffing and groaning. Her grip tightened, so much that if she pulled, she would end up with a few strands in her hands. HeStings of pain shot through his head and Kieran groaned, silencing Lauren as the vibrations from his throat hit her, pushing her just over the edge. The room went spinning around her as she moaned in ecstasy. He was doing so much to her, and he knew it. It was evident in her reaction. Evident in the way she was bucking her hips, the way her thighs shook, opening herself up to him. Every move of his put her over the edge. 

Fixing his grip on her thigh, he pushed it above his shoulder, wrapping it slightly around his neck as his hand supported her figure with a firm hold on her hip against the wall. His tongue reached deeper and pressed harder in her, lapping in the sweetness from her. Her eyes rolled back and her mouth was agape her loud breathing, and moaning and the sound of him sucking were the only sounds audible in the room. She didn’t know if she could take this any longer or not, but she didn’t want him to stop. And he didn’t stop, not like he did just a while ago. 

Her juices ran down her thighs, reaching down his lips, chin and neck. He pressed into her once again, tongue running wild as it rubbed against the bundle of her nerves, leaving her breathless. She bucked her hips once again, moans getting louder, and clenched finally, releasing in his mouth shivering as he licked her clean. Her body went limp, and her hands fell from his hair, as he removed her leg from around his neck. She was leaning on the wall for support, well-spent now, blissed-out. 

Both were left breathless, her, exhausted and recovering from their little deed, and him on the ground, looking at her. Licking his lips, he called out.

“Hey,”

Lauren jolted back to actuality. He was still on his knees, in front of her, smirking at her reaction. Lauren was breathing fine by now, but the flush was evident on her face. Kieran’s eyes softened looking at her. There was a hint of blush on her cheeks, and her hair was partly dry and messy, yet she looked so beautiful. He slowly reached up, towering above her and cupped her cheek, kissing her, softly this time, a hum vibrating from his throat as he swallowed her moan. 

He snaked his other hand around her waist and pulled her closer, as she wrapped her arms around him, grasping at his shoulders, her nipples rubbing and pressing against his chest. Kieran tilted his face to deepen the kiss one more time, before pressing his thumb on the edge of her lips to pull away. 

His eyes drifted to her neck. One side was covered with hickeys that he left not too long ago. He leaned in again to kiss them but was taken aback when he saw blood this time. Bloody fingerprints around Lauren’s neck. His eyes widened as he slightly flinched. Restlessness crept in him as his behaviour from that night hit him like a truck. His heart withered as he was reminded of what he did to this woman not too long ago. How he scared her, how she was struggling against his grip. A part of him broke away every time his memory was revived. 

_You must be the only one delusional enough to believe that._

_You disgust me_

_...or the selfish hypocrite?_

_Sure_

“What’s wrong?” Lauren noticed his reaction. 

“Huh?” He looked at her, then looked back at her neck. The marks were gone, only the hickeys were seen now. She moved her hands from around his neck and cupped his cheeks. "You okay?" she noticed the shine gone from his eyes before he closed them. Shaking his head he rubbed his thumb along the line of her cheekbone.

“ **Nothing** ,” He brushed back her hair from her neck holding her shoulder and was kissing her there before she could question him further about his lie. Lauren let out a soft sigh as his lips trailed from one side of her neck to the other, planting soft kisses all along the way. Slowly he moved towards her jaw and was kissing her everywhere he could, both her cheeks, her nose, the edge of her brow, finally stopping at her forehead. 

Lauren managed to remove her arm from his shoulder and snake it between their bodies and reached for his lower stomach. His breath hitched as her hand reached there and she started stroking him, raising his pulse as her hand moved up and down his length. He moaned slightly at the feeling, slowly removing his hand from her shoulder, pressing it to the wall behind her instead. His forehead leaned heavily against hers, brows drew in together in a frown as his breathing got louder and irregular by each passing second. She pressed a chaste kiss against his lips, as she started going faster, but he grabbed her wrist and stopped her from doing any further. 

“No, it’s about you tonight, not me” he huffed. 

“But--” He cut her off with a kiss. Soft at first, getting hungrier by each passing second. Lauren pulled away all of a sudden. 

“What’s wrong?” he asked, frowning. He was getting nervous.

“It’s not fair” 

“What’s not fair?”

“You...You’re not, letting me...ease you out, Kieran”

“Stop thinking about that” And he was nibbling at her ear again. His grip tightened around her waist pulling her closer yet again, her chest pressed against his as he let his fingers their way from her jaw to her breast, slowly starting to palm her, massaging gently. He continued moving his fingers over her, rubbing, and flicking her hard nipple. Lauren was shaking again, still sensitive from before. Kieran looked at her one last time before bending and placing his mouth on her breasts.

Sucking gently on her sensitive peaks, he rubbed his tongue over and over against her nipple, leaving the officer squirming and whimpering in his arms. While she busied herself with his hair, Lauren didn’t realise Kieran’s hand slid down from her ribs to her hips and she only noticed when she felt a finger enter her again. She jolted, letting a little yelp slip. She was still wet enough that on a mere brush, his finger slipped inside her with no resistance. 

“Still so wet?” He murmured against the slope of her breast, teasing her with his finger. She couldn't respond, she was too overwhelmed to build up one. Instead, her nails dug in his shoulders, they’re gonna leave marks. He thrust in another finger, this time with more force. He thrust and curled his fingers inside her, ending up with a panting Lauren pressed against the wall. And she was panting strenuously, eyes full of lust and want, moans, loud and needy, and he was savouring every minute of it. Their eyes locked again, and he reached up, fitting his mouth against hers. 

He’s kissing her again while working the digits out of her. All the pent up emotion now spilled out as she sucks on his bottom lip. They were practically devouring each other at this point, bodies heated, her hair, now dry, his, completely mussed. He forced his tongue past her lips, and a growl erupts from his throat as Lauren sucked on his tongue. 

Hastening his fingers, he pushed another finger inside. Her eyes rolled back once again as he bit hard on her upper lip, leaving the skin purple there. She started bucking her hips again as he mercilessly drilled his fingers, pumping inside her. She was left gasping again, till she pleaded. 

“Kieran, _please..._ ” His eyes darkened again as he heard her voice. 

“What?” He asked, feigning naivety, as he watched her flushed expression turn into a frown. She knew he was doing this on purpose. And she knew he was enjoying it, _which he clearly was_. He was smirking again, loving the way her brows twitched and mouth opened as his fingers moved inside her. She would’ve killed him without hesitation had this been a different situation. Instead, all she could do here was watch.

“ _I want you,_ ” she choked out, a whimper escaping her.

Then the chains snapped loose. He withdrew his fingers to which Lauren responded with a small whine. But the frown that formed on her face disappeared quickly as he removed his arms from around her and grabbed at her waist, lifting her up against him, ~~_like the last time_~~ like she was weightless. 

Her legs wrapped around his waist, as he pressed her into the wall. Her arms were around his shoulders, pulling him closer. Kieran hissed as Lauren started grinding herself at him, his length pressing and nudging against her. He lost control over his breath and Lauren bit back the smirk that threatened to form on her face. She was liking the effect she had on him at the moment. She vaguely had a thought on what he’d be like once she took control. 

“Easy there, tiger” Kieran let out a small chuckle, moving to her neck. He blew on one of the hickeys that started getting purple now. He held himself near her entrance and teased her with the tip, earning a buck of her hips.

“You really _are_ an eager one, huh?”

Without waiting for her response, he slowly started pushing his length inside her, leaving both of them gasping. A chill ran down his spine, as he was gradually consumed by her. _God, she’s tight._ Kieran was breaking, his own body shivering at the warmth that now surrounded him. He gained his composure while Lauren shuddered against him, forgeting about a response, she tilted her face leaning against his head, her desire eating her alive. She reached out to him, and he responded with a soft kiss. 

Finally, he started moving again, slow at first, savouring the feeling, watching how her breathing changed and her moans got louder, before pulling out thrusting back into her with more force. She moaned out in surprise, him doing the same, as he buried his face in her neck, kissing, brows pulled in a frown as his thrusts got faster, and _deeper_ , hitting that spot on repeat, leaving Lauren in a haze. She clenched at every thrust he made, leaving his length throbbing inside her. 

Lauren was a moaning mess, bucking her hips to match his rhythm. Her breathing got shallower, voice reaching a higher pitch. He could feel her near the edge so he removed one of his hands from her waist and reached between her legs, and started flicking her sensitive clit, making her squeal. Her nerves now overwhelmed, she was trembling wildly. She bit her lip, before releasing it and crying out louder again as she gripped on his shoulders for her dear life.

Kieran was starting to shiver himself now, but he forced himself and kept going, thrusts never faltering as an over sensitive Lauren was now panting, and completely out of breath in his arms. Kieran squeezed her as his face buried further from her collar bones to her neck. Her name was on his tongue, like a little plea.

His thrusts gradually started wavering, as Lauren groaned. Her back arched and he felt her tighten and contract around him one last time before they both cried out, and her body released, her moans loud and breathless, Kieran following shortly after.

Lauren was dizzy now, left in a daze, her body now dry. She was blissed out and finished. Kieran gently gripped her ass, feeling a slight twitch as pulled out of her. He gently put her down, back on her feet, as she leaned on him for support. Both of them were panting hard, her clawing his back so she could stand, and him pulling her closer. 

They stayed like that in silence for some time, locked in each other’s embrace. Neither of them initiating something. Lauren’s arms were around his waist, face in his chest, eyes closed, while Kieran held her around the shoulders, occasionally caressing her back, slipping his fingers in her hair, his head resting on hers. 

The tranquillity felt somewhat comforting after their little _affair._

And then Kieran spoke up again. 

“Are you okay?” he asked. Lauren hummed, nodding her head against his chest, eyes still closed. But this wasn’t the hard part what he wanted to know after, was.

“Do you...regret this…?” he finally asked. His voice was lower than he wanted it to be.

“Why would I? We both got what we wanted, what’s there to regret?” She mumbled against his skin. Her response was lucid, and something he could see coming as a possibility, but he still felt his heart sink when she spoke. A small part of him was well aware that something like this would never happen between him and Lauren, but to hear her say it in a way as if it wasn’t a big deal or something that didn’t matter still managed to bring discomfort in his chest. But what was this anyway? They weren't anything anyway. The world outside and this bathroom had become a different dimension for a while, once they leave this place, it will all go back to normal, and she will forget about it and move on, and he will too. _He would, right? Why wouldn't he?_ He was probably overthinking this. _~~Was he?~~ _He brushed off his thoughts and continued.

“Well, on a side note, are you really okay, _Officer_?” He bent his head a little, giving a small nudge to her temple.

“I am” she opened her eyes, finally looking at him.

Kieran sighed. This conversation would head to nowhere at this rate.

“You know, I may not have your ability but I can most definitely say that you are lying right now.” Lauren didn’t have a response to that. Where was he getting at?

He noticed her silence was not gonna go soon, so Kieran decided to continue again.

“Look, I’m just worried about you. I thought I knew the kind of workaholic you are, cause I’ve seen how far you can go regarding an investigation. I assumed it was just because you have a personal goal to achieve, but you’re even crazier at work.

Everyone’s pretty much aware of how ‘great’ your sleep schedule is, not that you do much to hide it, and you’re practically glued to your desk, high on caffeine, surrounded with paper which disappears by the end of the day. Had it not been for your patrols, you’d probably--” 

“Aw, is that concern I see? My, my, I really have the most caring subordinate after all,” She said chuckling and looked up at him. They went silent again, then both broke into another chuckle.

“Is it that surprising that I’m worried?”

“Not my problem that you are that hard to read” her arms wrapped around him one more time. 

“Ouch, Officer, I’m offended!” he laughed to which he was responded with a small slap to his chest. 

And they were laughing again, bickering about something else again. It was weird that it went from Lauren trying to forget her terrible day to them naked in the shower and then joking around like this. Since when were they this comfortable? Since when was she so happy around him? Their friendly rambling gradually came to an end and he continued to hold her gently as the peace started to envelop them.

“Hey Lauren?” he called after a long moment. She hummed again. Now, this was the thing Kieran was afraid of. His tone dropped to a slightly serious and a concerned one and he spoke the next few words he'd been meaning to since the evening with great caution. 

“Look, I wanted to say that, I’m sorry. Whatever happened that day, in the cave, I really should’ve kept my cool, but I--”

He stopped mid-sentence as Lauren suddenly tensed around him. The memories of that day were equally damaging to both of them. Lauren had tried not to think of the events of that day. Everything from that day was overwhelmingly disturbing. The news, his grip, the mockery dripping off his laughter. She hated every bit of it.

Every. Damned. Thing.

And suddenly, she no longer felt safe around him. A pang of guilt submerged Kieran. It was a bad idea to bring this up, but he had to let her know. He tried to caress her back one more time. 

“Don’t.” He flinched at the harsh tone her voice took. She removed her head from his chest and looked him dead in the eye. The carefreeness was gone, replaced with a harsh flinty glare. 

“I believe you’ve already apologised, _Kieran,_ I don’t want to talk about that night. What’s done is done, now get over it.” her words were clipped and her tone was flat, flat and _cold_. 

Removing her hands from around him, she got out of his embrace and headed out. He tried to hold her arm again, gently this time, but Lauren stopped him. Getting hold of his wrist, she removed his grip from around her arm, letting his wrist drop mid-air. The restlessness was back in Kieran. As if he opened a door that should've been left untouched. His fingers clenched into a fist before relaxing again. He turned around, leaning on the wall as her presence ghosted it, giving her the privacy she needed as she got dressed. 

Kieran got out the shower and started getting dressed as soon as Lauren was out the bathroom door. The sense of unfamiliarity started creeping in again. It wasn’t a good idea to bring that up. He could feel it, the hollowness, it grew, penetrating through his nerves, spreading throughout his body, making his chest feel empty. His heart pounded once then it got normal again, goosebumps raised on his neck as the blankness started filling him. He gulped as the voice echoed once again in his head. 

_Click--_

Buttoning up his shirt, he flipped off the light switch and left the bathroom. He couldn't hear her footsteps anymore. 

\------------------

Lauren was standing at the door, which was wide open. She would've left by now, not waiting to inform him or anything like that. They would still be seeing each other at the office anyway. She's going to get over it, she will eventually. ~~_She will_~~. However, she didn't leave, her feet were glued to the ground instead. There was nothing in her that stopped her this time. It was quite the opposite this time. Outside, the lightning cut, splitting the crack in the gloomy sky, followed by the booming thunder. The sky was roaring as the wind howled. 

“It wasn’t raining before, what happened?” Kieran emerged out of the washroom. Looking at her silhouette at the door. It took him a second to register why she wasn’t moving, and then the thunder cracked.

“I don’t know, moody weather maybe,” she muttered under her breath. 

Lauren closed the door as the lightning struck again, leaning her back to it as her head tilted slightly upwards, to face him. She was fully dressed now, attire crisp. She had on a casual white shirt, slightly bigger but well-fitting at the same time. The sleeves hung loosely over her shoulders, first two buttons were unfastened, her collar bones peeking out. The way her pants hugged her hips and legs really did justice to her body. Her hair was swept to one side, still slightly dishevelled, but neat at the same time and the entire aura around her was different. Very different. It would be hard to believe that she was just having a moment in a locked room before he crept in.

His jaw tightened as realisation crept in the back of his head as the little climbers do. He looked away. She’ll have to stay here, in the same house as him. But it would be for her own good if she went home. His presence was not wanted by her, he knew it, he could feel it. All he wanted to do was to make her feel better, and he probably, He didn’t want to be the pain in her neck. Not today, or any other day, or ever. He awkwardly fiddled with the doorknob which he did not realise he was still holding.

“Hey” Lauren snapped his attention back to her. She was the one looking away now. Rubbing her neck, she unintentionally ended up touching the warm skin of the bruises formed. The memory of his mouth there briskly registered in her head, the softness of his lips, his slow movement then how the reality slapped her in the face. She'd be lying if she said he didn't make her feel better, but a reminder of the events was like ripping a string out of her body and unwinding until she was nothing. Not even skin and bones, just nothing.

“Um...would you mind, if I stay here?” She hesitated, voice getting lower, dropping into a soft mumble fading out to the sound of the rain outside. She didn’t think she should stay, or not, or if he would even want her to be there anymore, but she was fine with anything at this point. She didn’t want to think of anything anymore. Just this day ending would be more than enough. Kieran didn’t know what to say for a moment. 

“Why would I have a problem?” He was looking in her direction, but his gaze wouldn’t meet hers. He looked around her, the clock above, droplets violently hitting the windowpane, the shadow of the couch looming over the floor. Everything but the glow of her eyes. 

“Stay here. We can’t have you falling sick now, can we?” A small smile started creeping on his face till he turned around and headed for the bedroom, “Let me just get the spare blankets, then the room is all yours”

“Actually, about that,” She took a step forward, but then stopped. Their eyes met again. She was hesitating and she didn’t know why. She clenched her fist in the side seam of her pants, then finally spoke after releasing a small huff “Can I sleep on the couch this time?” She said pointing towards the couch. Sleeping inside meant peering more inside Kieran. Bedrooms are the window to the soul. Not that this would be the first time, but after today's events, she'd doubt that Kieran and Lauren would even consider that choice.  
  


Kieran raised a brow at her strange request, “Sure, but it gets really cold at night, you won’t be able to sleep” He knew she wouldn’t enjoy the cold, that would be the last thing she would enjoy. Plus it was raining, it would be better if she cozied up inside. She was silent, which made his sweat turn to ice, making his back clammy. He may be able to see through her, but it was equally hard to point at what Lauren was thinking sometimes. After a long moment of silence, she finally responded. 

“But then what about you?” 

What about who? Him?

He didn’t say anything at first, but then his smile gave him away. He turned towards her direction and raised his hands and the finger quotation thing “Well, Officer, I’m a “ _caveman”_ , right? I’ll be fine, don’t worry about me” Lauren held back a snort at his statement, but a toothy smile crept on her face nevertheless. _~~And he liked watching her smile.~~ _

He disappeared into the bedroom and returned shortly with a spare pillow and a blanket. Placing them on the sofa, he looked at Lauren who was still at the door. He tipped his palms towards the bedroom door, gesturing. 

“All yours, Sinclair” 

She slowly walked past him in smaller steps, lips pursed and eyes looking down. His eyes followed her, till she walked into the bedroom, and gently shut the door. Kieran let out a small sigh, his smile fading slightly. His eyes lost their shine. He returned to the couch and reached the drawer to get the key to the locked room. It was here when he vaguely remembered Lauren tensing in his arms in the washroom not too long ago. 

_Don’t._

He sighed. Looking at the key, placed it back inside the drawer and closed it.

“Nevermind, not today” he whispered before moving away. He ignored the stifled feeling in him as he lays down on the couch, waiting for the dreamless slumber to take over. 

**Author's Note:**

> Soooo  
> This took me three days to write  
> Technically a month, cause I got the idea before ep 54 was even out,  
> Imagine my surprise when I read 54 
> 
> Anyway, it's not about that.  
> This was my first time writing smut, so it may not be as good,  
> Feedbacks and your thoughts are welcomed,  
> Tell me what you think, and leave Kudos!
> 
> Byeeee


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